I'm on Hello Giggles, Guys!

Hey, loyal-and-beautiful-reader-of-my-blog, guess what?!

Oh, did the post title already give it away? Well, whatever. 

I've got an article up on HelloGiggles.com today! It's one I wrote last year about getting married at the age of twenty-two. Due to my constant romantic declarations, many of you already know that I have been married for two years now to a handsome Disney prince of a man, and we are seriously having a blast. This article focuses on some of our experiences in the first year of marriage as well as the cultural response to "young" marriage.

Please feel free to read through the post (Progressively Married at Twenty-Two) and join the conversation because it's already getting pretty interesting in the comments-section! 

Thanks to the folks at Hello Giggles and thanks to all of you for just always being divine! 

Oh, and if you're visiting my blog from that article, well, hey there! Feel free to stick around.

Feelings Friday: Bravery

I received a very sweet email recently from a reader named Elizabeth who gave me a great suggestion for today's Feelings Friday. She's had the song "Brave" by Sara Bareilles stuck in her head lately, and it reminded her of how much meaning is packed in that one little word. I agree times a million, so let's talk about bravery, guys. Thanks, Elizabeth!

BRAVERY

While I was in Texas last week, I spent some time with my three-year-old niece, Amelie. Now, let me tell you, this girl is awesome. She is triple funny, quadruple cute, and she loves dinosaurs and spider monkeys to no end. I'm a big fan.

My husband, Daniel, learning about the joys of Facetiming with Amelie

There was a time when my mom and I were hanging with Amelie where she showed us a "boo-boo" she had, and by "boo-boo" I obviously mean the most insignificant, teeny-weeniest, basically microscopic, little smudge on the side of her index finger. I responded by telling her that it's easy to get little boo-boos here-and-there while we are playing, but it's important to be brave when we get them. She looked at me a little puzzled, and my mom prompted me to explain what "brave" meant.

I quickly realized that it is a hard word to define. Google will churn out lots of definitions for "bravery", most of which involve even more challenging words like "courage" and "valiance" which are honestly just synonyms anyway. Probably the best definition comes from Merriam Webster which defines "brave" as feeling or showing no fear : not afraid, but even then, that seems a bit oversimplified.

"Bravery" is one of those words that changes in the context of growing up. It's a word that usually has a face, and that face will be different for everyone. For my niece, this might be her picture of bravery:

Just look at this heroine, swinging from vines with reckless abandon, unafraid of spending time with a wild animal and a talking map. This scene is surely the perfect image of bravery in the mind of a three-year-old.

But for you, your picture might look something more like this:

or this:

or this:

or this:

It is easy to see bravery in the lives of the people we admire. It can be significantly more difficult to recognize our own. When I moved to New York City, I would commonly hear from loved ones back home that I seemed so adventurous taking my life so far away from Texas. I hear similar things about my recent start in improv and standup comedy. People often ask how I know what to say, how I keep from passing out. I always meet these comments with slight surprise because literally every single one of those things -- moving away from home, standing up in front of strangers and telling jokes, performing completely unrehearsed shows -- scares the living beejeezus out of me. 

But the thing is, regardless of what our friend Merriam-Webster would have you believe, bravery does not exclude fear. It can very much exist alongside it, and it has everything to do with our response to it. Our life's bravest moments are also some of our most terrifying. But it's not about merely putting on a straight face when you actually feel like crapping your pants. Pretending you aren't afraid is not bravery. 

In fact, the opposite is usually always true. For example, Queen Bey herself (Beyonce) taught me that lesson at the Barclays Center back in August. It was the last stop on her Mrs. Carter tour, and after blowing our minds with her rendition of "End of Time", she giggled a perfect giggle and said, "I'm a little nervous, y'all." And the audience erupted with joy at the sheer vulnerability of the moment, and then she started flipping her hair, and it was all amazing.

Brave as all hell

Bravery involves discerning what the situation calls for regardless of how scared you are. It's about knowing with full confidence when to stand up, when to sit down, when to speak loudly, and when to cry. It's the reason why a woman staying seated on a bus and a police officer rushing to a crime scene and a man telling a woman he loves her and a girl raising her hand in class can all be considered people of bravery. It looks different in every scenario, but you know it when you see it. 

And the thing about exhibiting bravery is that it makes others around you more brave, too. I remember being a camp counselor and having to camp out in the woods with a gaggle of eight-year-old girls, each more scared than the other. But the most frightened person out there, of course, was me. I knew the real dangers that existed: snakes, wild dogs, humidity! Still, I knew I had a responsibility to keep it together for my girls, and by morning they all felt like heroes for making it through the night. Bravery insights bravery.

It's how the really big, beautiful decisions of the world eventually get made. One person stands up for something, even though they are scared to death, and others are inspired to do the same. It's a remarkable alternative to the easier, more popular option of cowardice, and it seriously changes the world.

Bravery breaks the norm, but more specifically, it breaks your norm. It defies your body's sympathetic nervous system. It chooses fight when you would absolutely choose flight. 

Think carefully, then, about what bravery looks like for you. It might not necessarily mean putting on a space suit and floating above earth's atmosphere. It might look more like having a tough conversation or going to a social event even though the thought of it makes you really sweaty. It might even mean packing up your bags and moving to New York City to hang out with me (just saying, we've got great brunch options up here). Think on it. Pray on it. Hopefully, you already know what you need to do.

I leave you with the song that inspired it all. Who inspires you to be brave? 

What More Could We Ask For?

Today I posted a picture that lit up my Instagram like no other picture I've ever posted. It wasn't of a baby or a cat or any of the usual things that would get such high levels of love on social media. It was a tree. A really beautiful tree, but a tree nonetheless. It seemed to rock everyone's world, so I thought I would share it with you. I hope it rocks yours as well.

Are you loving it? I took this today on a stroll in Prospect Park right here in Brooklyn. This park is a place of peace and reflection for me squeezed in-between one of the most densely populated areas in the country. It is one of my greatest geographical blessings, and I thank God every time I'm there. 

Prospect Park just never seems to disappoint, no matter the season. This picture is obviously of a crisp autumn day, but check out this beauty I took back in the spring.

I mean, come on!

I remember this day well, actually. Two weeks prior, I had put in my notice at work, and this was the first morning in which I was truly free of a job that had felt fairly suffocating. There was relief, sure, but as I walked around Prospect Park that morning I had no idea what I was going to do, what my next steps were, and I was positively riddled with anxiety and self-doubt. As I approached this blossoming tree and began to take in how truly beautiful it was, a man standing nearby (the one pictured above) caught my attention. He was smiling ear-to-ear as he lifted up his arms, looked at the sky and said to himself and to me, "Praise God. What more could we ask for?" 

Now, a lot of things have been said to me by strangers in New York City. Just today, while I was feeling particularly fierce in my red coat, a man pointed at me and announced to passersby, "The lady in red doesn't impress me! She turns me on, but she does NOT impress me!" And that's a far more tame version of the things usually shouted at me, and all women in New York City, on a daily basis. I tend to roll my eyes and forget most of it by lunch time. 

But I have never forgotten the words spoken to me by the man in Prospect Park that day. It was exactly what I needed to hear in that time of my life. There I stood full of anguish over the uncertainty of my future when in front of me stood a symbol of God's provision. I had everything I needed. The sun rose that morning. I was breathing and my blood was pumping. Everything else in my life -- the caring friendships, the faithful husband, the vibrant city in which I was living -- were gifts. Seriously, what more could I ask for? 

Any time I am in Prospect Park, I am reminded of that same lesson. Then I leave, and I forget it pretty much immediately because life is crazy and I can be pretty dramatic about it sometimes. 

Oh well. Thankfully the park is just a short walk away anytime I need it. 

What gifts in life have you been reminded of lately?

Back to Brooklyn, Back to Blogging

Full disclosure: I have started writing this post multiple times in the last hour, and each attempt I have made has ended with me deleting everything and then walking to the kitchen to eat a pickle. I have now eaten seven pickles, so I feel like I should probably just shoot straight with you guys.

You may or may not have noticed that I sort of fell off the planet in the last couple of weeks. My last blog post was about how Feelings Friday, something that I invented without provocation, was canceled, so at that point, I'm sure you could already tell that I was pretty much checking out mentally.

The thing is...I've been busy. Really, really busy. Lame, right? I mean, that's really it. Worst excuse ever.

For those of you who read regularly, I am sorry I left you hanging for a while there. I mean, how can you ever trust me again? You can't. Let's be honest. Reading my blog is a little bit like dating this guy:

Sure, he might make some promises he won't keep. He might miss your birthday or leave you in a Denny's bathroom. He's an unpredictable, dangerous bad boy...isn't that part of the fun?

Actually, scratch that. Don't date that man up there. And don't think of my blog as an irresponsible biker boyfriend.

Instead, imagine reading Avoiding Atrophy as being happily married to this guy:

I don't know...I just feel like he's the reliable type. 

Anyway, here is a list of things I've been up to since I last posted. I assure you that I will expand on all of these things in the days ahead.

1. I completed my Improv 201 class at The Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre.

UCB logo

2. I've also been doing a little bit of stand-up here and there.

Looking SUPER comfortable in a cat-print button-down

3. I went apple-picking in the utterly lovely world of upstate New York.

Photo credit goes to Jess! This is my friend, Clint, and he's basically my brother.

4. I went home to San Antonio, Texas and ate breakfast tacos every single morning. 

5. I spent some much-needed time with my precious niece, Amelie. She is three-years-old and loves spider monkeys as well as talking about spider monkeys.

6. I had a reunion with some of my oldest and dearest friends.

7. I traveled to Austin, Texas and ate this outrageously scrumptious dessert from Salty Sow:

Don't worry. I shared it with my sister.

8. I spent a weekend of wedding festivities as the Matron of Honor for my sweet friend, Emily.

I definitely have more thoughts (and pictures) to share on this one.

9. I wore false eyelashes for the first time and made this face about it:

Anyway, I'm back in Brooklyn for another two weeks and then back to Texas for another wedding. Busy-bee-party-of-one over here, but I will not forget you in all of this. I'll try to make this blog more like the reliable jockey husband as opposed to the flakey biker boyfriend. You'll see, you'll see.

What did I miss while my head was in the clouds the last few weeks? 

Is Miley still doing stuff? I have no idea.

Feelings Friday...or is it?

It's Feeling Friday! 

I've gotten into the habit of using this day (and this alliterative excuse) to work through the functions of some of humanity's most prominent emotions. This week, however, I have chosen to follow the advice of a dear friend.

You got it, Severus. Today, I'm just going to keep all of my feelings in check and not dwell on any particular one. Feelings Friday is cancelled. 

The truth is I have been wrestling with which of my many feelings I wanted to throw down today, but I couldn't decide. Embarrassment? Regret? Hunger? That's an emotion, right?

So then I started feeling anxious, which is a feeling, but whatever, you get the dilemma. Anyway, today I'm going to take a breather on the whole having-emotions business. Next week I'll be back with some juicy ones. For now, though, I think I'll just watch some truly benign reality television and call it a day.

As penance, here is a picture of me from high school. Please feel free to work through any feelings that arise as a result of viewing such strangeness. 

I hope you're happy. 

Or sad? I don't know. Feelings Friday is confusing.

But seriously, how are you feeling today? I'm listening.

October, Halloween, and Costume Anxiety

It's October, and seriously, people are enamored of this month.

This quote was the very first thing I saw in my newsfeed on Facebook today, and while I think my good friend L.M. here might be a little bit aggressive in her love of the month, she reminds me just how very psyched I am to get this whole October thing going.

So far, so good, by the way. Today, I woke up, guzzled down a pumpkin coffee like a pro, and went to my improv class at the Upright Citizens Brigade. In the weeks that follow, I'll be celebrating my girl, Emily's, marriage, connecting with some well-missed friends in Texas, and running amidst the changing leaves in Prospect Park (oh, by the way, I'm running now).

But I have to say, for as much goodness as this month promises, when October strikes, I immediately regress to an eight-year-old girl, unabashedly PUMPED about candy, costumes, and watching the Treehouse of Horror episodes of The Simpsons.

Halloween is 30 days away, and you guys, this holiday is where it's at. This is true for a million reasons and yes, most of those reasons involve the movie Hocus Pocus.

Flawless.

While my family didn't really celebrate Halloween, it was an inescapable aspect of living in San Antonio (HELLO, Dia de los muertos, anyone?) and I grew so fond of the joy with which my town reveled in skulls and corn mazes. In my adult life, I go to great lengths to honor this day.

One of my favorite and least favorite things about Halloween is dressing up. It's my favorite because dressing up is always a win in my book. It's my least favorite because I have an undocumented condition referred to as Costume Anxiety. It's the reason that two years ago, I dressed up as a Cat Nurse Practitioner. 

You know...it's like a cat...but it's also a nurse practitioner...so I can land on my feet...and prescribe most medications...?

That, my friends, is the face of a woman who decided on her costume at the last minute. I bought a bunch of dress-up paraphernalia from Goodwill, all of which were pieces that had nothing to do with the other. After a mini-panic attack, I slapped on some kitty ears and called it a day.

Around this time every year, my sister usually sends me a text message telling me what she's going to be, and it's always amazing, and I'm always left wondering why I didn't think of that. I got the text over the weekend, and surprise surprise, she's crushing it again this Halloween. Seriously, how does she do it?

Well, I'd like to be similarly prepared this year with a cute, clever costume. Right now I have nothing, but here are some ideas from an off-the-cuff brainstorm session. You will notice they follow a similar theme...

1. Zooey Deschanel as a cat

It should surprise no one that this has already happened.

2. Martha Stewart as a cat

3. Hermione Granger: Post-Polyjuice Potion after mistakingly using cat fur instead of the hair of a Slytherin

4. Couples Costume: Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake in denim...buuuuut they should also be cats

5. The Chair from The Voice...with a cat...and CeeLo, I guess

Minus the cats, some of these might be good ideas. 

Feel free to weigh in on my costume selection. I'm fine making this decision by consensus. Also, what are you dressing as for Halloween?